Hold up, before you cringe up with that look on your face to give a resounding NO,let’s take a look at what it means to be a Narcissist. According to Wikipedia, Narcissism is the pursuit of gratification from vanity or egotistic admiration of one’s own attributes. I got an email today and the first that came to mind was ‘Narcissist’ which was a queer thought but this was suggested following a meeting I had with the individual where he brought attention to himself as an individual than the team he leads . Some of us are
Workplace Narcissist – we believe that we are the best in any team and no one can do what we do. We find ways to draw attention to ourselves in any meeting or gathering as this fuels our egotistic admiration of ourselves. At first,this may seem great and initially be considered a leadership trait but as time progresses, its easy to differentiate the two as a leader would empower the rest of the team and step away from the spotlight to let others shine. Ask your self when was the last time I learnt from my colleague or gave my colleague a boost. I am not saying we become walkovers but we should try to checkmate ourselves when all we think about is ourselves when it comes to the job
Relationship Narcissist: This can be evident in our relationship with both family and friends. Its a bit trickier here as to people outside the relationship, a narcissist would seem perfect as this is what he/she wants you to see because this is a way to further draw attention to himself. As we all know, we tend to get too familiar with family which makes it more difficult for a narcissist to care what perception his or family has of them. For friends since there are no permanent bonds, its easy to recycle friends and keep only those that constitute our fan club and tell us what we want to hear not what we need to hear.
Social ME-dia Narcissist: Guess what?! I think the largest group of people belong to this group because its so easy to do it without even realizing its being done. Ed Young in 50 Shades of THEY came up with 8 groups of people there are on Social Media. I think its a good way to check ourselves and what role social media plays in our lives
• Hal Humility – This is the person who is prideful in their humility, who promotes their lowliness in spirit, who brags and then throws in words like “humbled” and “blessed.” So often we’re prideful in our humility and humble in our pride.
• Dana Destination – She’s always promoting another travel spot, reminding you: “I’m here and you’re not.”
• Tim Trophy. – He loves to post photo after photo of his accomplishments. Maybe he throws in a picture of him with a celebrity or he tells you all about his trophy friends.
• Susan Selfie – Every picture is the same. When she takes a picture or posts a comment, the focus is always on her.
• Paula Party – She’s always at a party making you think, “Why didn’t I get invited? I guess I don’t have as many friends as she does.”
• Sam Soapbox – He hyper focuses on one issue and never lets it go. Every post is a rant about the same thing.
• Barbara Bikini – She loves to get the lust engines going. She posts photos of herself in a bikini, but then she’ll throw up a random Bible verse attached to it.
• Ed Ego – He knows how to crop the photo, add a filter to it, and make everything about it just right to make him look like he is the MAN and you are not.
”It’s all about the way people spin it and the way we perceive it. Again, its highlight reel living”
Social Media is great and I love all (most of) the doors its opened in the world. However…’‘And social media,If we’re not careful becomes social ME-dia, pumping up our pride and incubating our insecurities”
Let’s check whatever narcissistic tendencies we may have before it overtakes us and directs our actions.